Right now, I'm feeling like zksanfanjsak. In case you don't speak fluent smacking forehead on the keyboard, that translates roughly to "So freaking screwed for my exams, it's not even funny".

Procrastination: 1, May: 0

It finally sinked into my brain today that exams are 2 weeks away and I've got so much to study; it's a joke. Right now, I feel like the whole world is continuously moving but I'm just standing still. It's not that I don't know what to do, but I've just realized that there is TOO much to do. Right now, my pulse is racing like a mad horse and I'm pretty sure it's because of the creeping possibility of failure staring straight into my eyes.

I AM SO STRESSED RIGHT NOW THINKING ABOUT MY STUDIES THAT I'M GETTING MIGRAINES THAT LITERALLY GO UP TO MY NECK.

If I fail my exams, there is a high possibility I'll be employed as a professional sea sponge or even a block of cheese. When I joked around a few months ago and wrote on my blog "Future career: Wouldn't mind being a professional sea sponge or even a block of cheese" - I didn't realize it would one day mutate from words on a blog post to a sort of weird reality.

Yes, this does mean a hiatus for two weeks, but I shall see you all on the flip side!

On the 12th of May, I attended the Hillsongs One Day Perth Conference. I remember walking into the challenge stadium and immediately being overwhelmed by the crowd. Just seeing the amount of people gathered there was enough to make my jaw to drop - literally. The amount of times my jaw dropped the whole time I was there, was enough for me to wonder if I was going home, jawless. (Yes, I'm so lame.)

So there I was, standing with GMC'ers amidst a huge, huge crowd of people singing their hearts out to God. And although there were times my lips barely moved, I really felt my heart being moved. For the first time in a really, really long time, I felt like everyone under the same roof were family to me even though most of the people there were just strangers.

If it wasn't from Sharon who generously 'gave up' her ticket to me, I would never have gotten the opportunity to be a part of this powerful praise and worship and words can't describe how truely grateful I am! Thank you.

Unfortunately, even with a 10.1 mega pixels camera, I had a hard time trying to take clear shots with my camera. As you are about to see in the following pictures, my self worth as a photographer is only as good as the quality of the pictures I'm about to show in this blog post - which will give you the impression that I took all this pictures using a 2 megapixel camera. That's how bad it is. 'Nuff said.

My recording of the hillsongs performance were so bad that when I played the video I recorded on my camera, I couldn't even hear them singing. It was terrible. In the end, I had to resort to typing 'hillsongs conference perth' on youtube so that I could actually put up videos of the performance on my blog. Shame.

Here's 2 videos of the perth performance that I found on youtube.

'your name high' by hillsongs.



We ended the a-MAY-zing night with 'one way'...



It was truely an awesome night!

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That is all.

You may not know me, but I know everything about you (Psalm 139.1)
I know when you sit down and when you rise up (Psalm 139.2)
I am familiar with all your ways (Psalm 139.3)
Even the very hairs on your head are numbered (Matthew 10.29-31)
For you were made in my image (Genesis 1.27)
In me you live and move and have your being (Acts 17.28)
For you are my offspring (Acts 17.28)
I knew you even before you were conceived Jeremiah (1.4-5)

COLOSSIANS 3:23

I've known about this verse for very long, and although I knew it's important to take note of it and apply in our daily lives, I realize now that perhaps I may not have fully grasped the true meaning of it. Perhaps, what it always only meant to me was that I should focus on pleasing God -- and not men. And although I think there's truly nothing wrong with that, I think I may have missed out on the rest of its implications.

For one, the verse says "whatever you do," which means that in every single thing we do, no matter how mundane or unrelated to God as it seems, we should work at it wholeheartedly for Him. But what about our hobbies, or the things we do out of leisure? Well, I still can't quite answer that. What I know, though, is that we should examine whether or not these hobbies work for or against our growth as followers of Christ. So, maybe each time we watch something or do something fun with our friends, we should always consider how it's going to affect ourselves in our walk with God, as well as whether or not it will be something that pleases or displeases Him.

Secondly, it says to "work at it with all your heart," which tells us to give whatever it is we're doing our best shot. We ought to do it by being the best version of ourselves through God's great help. There is nothing too small to be worked at with all our hearts. Even something as small as making a good sandwich, I believe, applies to this verse. Like it says in the bible, 1 Corinthians 6:19 - "Don't you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and who was given to you by God?". But, how do we fix ourselves a sandwich our best shot? For me, I think it's as simple as making it taste good but at the same time, healthy and not artery-clogging - nourish our body with what we eat and not trash it.

The verse ends with "as working for the Lord," which obviously means that we should do everything for the glory of God, right? But why is it that actually doing it seems so difficult once we're finally out there trying to do it? I think the answer is pretty simple: It’s because we have too many masters, instead of having just one, and that is God. But we’re such people pleasers, aren’t we? I think whether or not we admit it, we’re all bound to want to please ourselves or other people first before wanting to please God. Now that’s the hard/tricky part. Although I think it’s not absolutely wrong to want to please people, it becomes problematic to do so when we put others before God, or when we use the world’s standards first in measuring our success in the things we do before we use God’s.

I realize it all boils down to setting our priorities straight.

Who is our main master, really?
Who do we look to when it comes to what we do and how we do them?
And whom do we do them for?

Firstly, I'm going to be really honest and say that as I type up this blog post in the comfort of my own room, I'm not too comfortable blogging about my friendship with Joyce. In fact, If I had a choice right now, I wouldn't publish this post at all. Why?

To be honest, I'm not too sure about it myself but I just don't like talking about my friendship with Joyce to others. There are some friendships which holds a special place in my heart and I rather keep it personal and I guess, this is just one of them.

I guess you could say that when it comes to my relationship with Joyce, she is my sister from another mother. Our relationship is basically like any other ordinary siblings relationship. The way you get annoyed at your siblings is probably the same way we get annoyed at each other.

I'm pretty open to everyone about the funny things that happens to both of us when we are together but other than that, I tend to be pretty discrete about everything else. I guess to me, the way the MJ (May/Joyce) relationship works has always been kept like a secret behind close doors. It's not that I want to be secretive, but it's more like a topic that I rather not talk about UNLESS - you are really close to both of us. But even then, I don't really share much.

But, Joyce is very special to me and she changes my life just by being part of it. She makes me believe that there is really 'good' in the world. She walks in when the rest of the word walks out. There are times, she knows what I'm thinking or feeling and I don't need to say anything. Sometimes, we communicate through eye contact and make funny hand actions before one of us burst out laughing. We tend to whisper to each other instead of casually talking (like, we are speaking a different language from a different world ;D) and we have our moments where we randomly burst out laughing at the top of our lungs after attempting to communicate through facial expression.

I can spend the entire day doing nothing with Joyce and by the end of the day, make a million memories out of it. And most importantly, she brings out the best in me and makes me a better person just by being herself.

We've had our ups and downs and in this close to 2 years friendship, I've learnt a lot of things. I've learnt that sometimes, you just got to learn to give & take. You can't have everything your way, and compromising with each other is really important. I've learnt that even if you don't agree with each other, instead of arguing about the most pointless things, sometimes, you just got to shut up, and keep your opinions to yourself. Ego & pride counts for nothing when your measuring it to friendship.



Some of our mutual friends in JPYM sees me and Joyce as 'one' so I guess it wouldn't be wrong to say that sometimes, people do sees us as twins probably because we are always seen within a 5-10m radius of each other. If Joyce isn't standing with me, people usually proceeds to ask me, 'Where's Joyce?' and vice versa. Sometimes, I feel like I need to know the whereabouts of Joyce just in case people ask me. But sometimes, it's just annoying.

However, I think we both try & make a conscious effort not to be 'glued' to each other when we are hanging out as a group though, by the end of the day, we always find ourselves walking beside each other and gossiping(?) - *post ends abruptly*

I think we are both truely blessed by God to have such an awesome friendship.

When you are sad, I will dry your tears.
When you are scared, I will comfort you.
When you are worried, I will give you hope.
When you are confused, I will help you cope.
And when you are lost, and can't see the light.
Just know that I shall be your beacon, shining ever so bright.

This is my oath, I pledge till the end.
Why you may ask? Because your my friend.



Love you, ogly.