Note: BRACE YOURSELF - this is going to be a very wordy post.

This study week (aka holidays to me) has been really busy but yet, there were lots of good memories. My main aim this week was to work on my assignments which I barely touched. However, I think this holidays has been a life-changing journey for me.

I have learnt that giving someone a hug could be the smallest thing as putting your arms around them for a few seconds but it's seeing the smiles that forms on their face that really means the most.

I have learnt that no matter how close you are with someone, there are times.. when they are just going to offend and upset you, and vice-versa. But, sometimes.. you just forgive them because you know that deep inside, you love them and you still want them in your life.

I have learnt that there are times, you are going to find yourself on different wavelengths with your close friends and that you can't exactly 'click' with them. But instead of sulking and moaning, don't think too much about it and just let it go - don't even bother trying. If it comes back, it's yours.. if it doesn't, it never was.

Just before the end of last year, I got told that I am quite a 'mystery' to others. (And when I tell people that they are a mystery to others, it's a bad thing - a flaw in MY dictionary.) So, this year, I have been trying really hard to make myself less of a mystery because I wanted to be potrayed differently. Because if there's something I learnt, 'If your being seen as quiet, reserved and someone that keeps things to yourself (A mystery), then don't expect people to share their worries and troubles with you". It's human nature. If you portray yourself as a 'mystery', then you are going to find people portraying themselves as a 'mystery' back to you. That's why being a 'mystery' to others - FLAW. Friendship is and always will be a two-way street. Don't expect others to open up to you, if you don't open up to them. I learnt that the hard way but I've changed now.

I have learnt that your role model will never always be the same - it changes with time. Also, I have learnt that people actually look up to me as a role model. I'm kinda flattered but the responsibility and pressure of being a good role model to them kinda scares me.

I have learnt that, when your comfortable with someone, how long you know them doesn't seem to matter. If your comfortable with them and you see them opening up to you, and you feel like doing the same, don't hold yourself back. Go with the gut feeling.

How else should I describe my holidays? Well...
(in no particular order - please excuse the messy wordy post)

It was receiving an e-mail telling me I got one of the Murdoch Scholarship. It was about hanging out with friends I was never close to before. It was about enjoying the company of a new circle of friends - CV Crew. It was sending friends off at the airport and knowing that I was part of the biggest circle of friends there bidding her a safe trip compared to the rest of the crowd. Now, that's friendship. The decision to get maccas at 12 midnight with the CV crew and eating it together on the top of Yohaan's car in an empty car park while sharing 2 drinks between 6 people. It was about waking up, immediately logging on facebook during lunch time and within 20 minutes, finding yourself in the car heading to spencer village for lunch wiith Tiffy & Kathleen.

It was the group hugs and the 'I love you, I got your back' with JPYM'ers. It was about meeting my cell-group for the first time, and not noticing that it was already past 12a.m and that everyone has been chatting for over 5 hours. It was about checking my phone to see 6 missed call from the same person, thinking that he was in trouble, I frantically called him back only to realize that all they wanted to ask me was whether I wanted to watch 'Clash of the Titans' together with the rest of the CV crew. It was about receiving a call from Yohaan telling me that if I ever need someone to talk to, I would know how to get in contact with him with made me go 'Awwwww'. It was staying up to 5a.m with Tiffy and falling asleep while in the midst of a conversation. It was being woken up before 12a.m everyday either because of a text or phone call(s). It was about catching up with my school cliques at Nicholson Bar & Grill, and realizing that I was on different wavelengths with them and that lots of things have changed in the past few months.

It was about watching Tiffy teach Yohaan how to play Mahjong. It was getting a FAMILY meal from maccas for the first time during our break from Mahjong. It was not wearing make-up in front of the CV crew (my friends) for the first time since I started to wear make up and just learning to not be so self conscious. Like I said, if you feel comfortable with them, go with your gut feeling. It was the feeling of being involved in a crew where everyone really made an effort to build friendships and slowly got to understand each individual's flaws and accepting them. It was the late night d&m conversations with the CV crew. It was about going to Yohaan's room and seeing a Superman poster and feeling my heart sink. It was receiving a gift from a friend that just recently came back on a holiday and knowing that you were remembered.

(OMG - don't your eyes kill when you read this? Mine does.)
I doubt anyone's going to read up to here. lol.

It was being surprised and attempting to surprise someone - which backfired. It was leaving bubble tea outside their door with a note, ringing the doorbell, attempting to run away and hitting my leg on the side of their car then hitting the car twice and swearing at it then realizing I was such an idiot. It was giving someone a surprise and hoping that it would make your day like it made theirs and knowing you still felt down as before even after making someone's day. It was telling the anthony's, it's a SECRET and telling them not to mention about this to others and hours later, being tagged on a facebook status and realizing they just announced it to the whole facebook world and knowing that I now officially owe surprises to 10 other people. It's a 'secret' for a reason. It was about JPYM sitting in a whole row of seats in church and swaying together to the music and clapping to the same beat during easter mass. It was receiving a phone call, with someone saying 'Hi. Did you know, I love you and I got your back way more than you think I do. Bye" and realizing that they forgot to put their phone on private. It was about logging on facebook, checking my notifcations and seeing majority of them to be JPYM'ers/Rodrick Fierze.

So yeah, It was a really great week for me. I think right now, my life seems to consist mostly of JPYM'ers. It's kinda good thing but yet a bad thing. Sometimes, I get so comfortable with one group, I tend to forget about the rest. My apologies!

Exams are coming up soon, assignments are pilling up and this constant hanging out was definitely fun and enjoyable but unfortunately, it's time we press 'pause' and concentrate on our studies. Of course we will still see each other during youth and events so it's not really goodbye.

Please note that CV crew is not a 'group' meant to offend anyone who thinks they are not part of it because they don't live in Canning Vale. We never meant it as a side group from JPYM. It's just a 'name' because majority of the people who chooses to hang out together all live in Canning Vale and the reason CV crew started to form subconsciously was because, I think we all wanted to grow our friendships with each other and look to each other for support.
(But, Invitation is ALWAYS open to core members of JPYM)

So yes.
Goodbye for now~